Febrile Hallucinations

I've been battling bug lately. It manifested as a brutal fever which, I'm quite convinced, gave me febrile hallucinations. I've never had such an experience. I was sick in bed trying to sleep when this horrible dream began. I dreamed that I was in a bureaucratic vicious circle, and that I was in charge of 'fixing the phones and making sure the wheelchairs worked.' I would wake up often because of the fever and felt my blankets becoming more and more drenched in sweat. Too weak and chilled to get up for water or a pill, I shut my eyes and tried to slip back to sleep.

Phones. Wheelchairs. Wake up. Sweaty blankets. Repeat. It was exhausting. I felt as though I had been working hard, physically and mentally, when I should have been resting. This made me frustrated on top of everything else. My heart rate was 90 bpm, racing as though I was doing heavy physical labour.




In my dream I began to construct an elaborate structure out of phone cables and wheelchair parts. It looked like junkyard art and was extremely complex. If my brain was a computer, the amount of detail going into this fruitless activity would have maxed out my RAM. I climbed up atop the structure and lay upon it, and then woke up. I couldn't tell where I was. Was I still atop the junk pile? I spread my hands out over my mattress to convince myself that I was awake and only suffering a bad dream. A drip of sweat dropped off my earlobe.

I was suddenly overtaken with an urgency to get back into my dream to continue the futile work I was assigned to. Part of me knew that it was just a dream and that I was not accomplishing anything, but the other was OBSESSING about getting the job done. The line separating reality and fantasy was becoming blurred. I was slipping in and out of consciousness, becoming more and more frustrated in and out of the dream of the exhausting and repetitive nature of what was happening to me, while at the same time becoming more obsessed with completing the task.

I finally had enough at 5 AM. I said out loud 'this is not real.' The psychotic sense of urgency wouldn't go away, so I began to repeat 'no. no. no!' I eventually gathered enough courage to get out of bed and get some water. I wore my housecoat and winter jacket to brave the 20C (68F) temperatures that my body deemed were frigid. After this, the problem was over.

I washed all my linens today and it cost me $6.

Dafoe Library: Retched Blessing

I had a fairly productive study session yesterday in Dafoe Library, the largest library on the University of Manitoba campus. I typed up three sets of textbook notes complimenting three lecture units, approximately 4 hours of work. It was for my human geography course and the subject matter was invigorating: a bonus. There's nothing better than finishing work worth doing, I say.

As you may have read in posts previous, I have been feeling ill for the past week and a half. I began to feel a reprieve from the flu on Monday and thought that the worst of it was behind me. Lately, in my world, everything I thought was true has instead been re-labled "work in progress." The really important questions of life have been dogging me, and I need time to figure them out.

A quick taste, a preview if you will, of what I'm talking about: It became quickly apparent that I was wrong about overcoming my illness when I began vomiting, without expectation, on the second floor of Dafoe. I had coughed and tasted bile in the back of my throat, and with a precious three seconds before eruption had managed to perch over a tiny garbage pail. I remained in this state for five minutes, fielding looks from concerned (read "horrified) fellow peers who were probably not expecting this, either. No one tried to help me, much to my then thankfulness and now dismay. Thanks a lot, no-hearts!




After the 'event' I noticed a large pile of clean Starbucks napkins just sitting on an empty table one meter from where I blew it.

Seriously now. If you have to throw up unexpectedly in public, it can't get any better than having a garbage can at your feet and a pile of napkins just sitting there waiting for some night janitor to come throw them out.

And to add even more blessing to injury: After I managed to clean myself up sufficiently I called my friend, Milena, to tell her what happened. If anyone would understand, it would be her. She just happened to be on campus and wanted to see me to give me a hug. I freshened up in my dorm and we talked about the really important questions of life for two hours.

All things considered equal, this was one of the most retched blessings I have ever had.

My friends are not licensed medical professionals

Despite what my friends suggested, I don't have mono! Man, just saying that makes me feel a whole lot better. I went to see my family doctor today. He suspects that I have a variation of the flu that does not involve excessive respiratory inflammation. So the chills and headache and lack of appetite fit under the category of influenza as well.

He said I should feel better within a few days, and that lifts my spirits. Perhaps I won't flunk out of school after all.

Here's a funny video about me theorizing about how my humidifier could be making me sick, 3 days ago. While it probably wasn't the cause of my maladies, I'm glad I caught it!

I've got mono

Self diagnosis, but consider the facts, from Medicinenet.com

One may be developing mono if they experience these symptoms:

* a general lack of energy or malaise,
* a loss of appetite, and
* chills.

I happen to be exhibiting all these symptoms simultaneously much to my displeasure and discomfort. But this rabbit hole becomes even darker.

These initial symptoms can last from one to three days before the more intense symptoms of the illness begin. The more common intense symptoms include:

* a severe sore throat,
* fever, and
* swollen glands (lymph nodes) in the neck area.

It is typically the severe sore throat that prompts people to contact their doctor.

This evidence, coupled with the fact that I've never had mono before and you can only get mono once, leads me to the conclusion that I want my mommy.

I may be out of commission in Web 2.0 for the next couple days (weeks). Be a doll and send me a get well comment, or come change my linens and give me a sponge bath. You can spoon feed me or read me stories. You can write my essays and compile my notes. You can take my tests and send me to Cuba on holidays after I'm better.

Old men followed by fevers

I saw No Country For Old Men yesterday with Tim P. It was a really fantastic movie, though not one that I'd ever like to see again due to its graphic nature. There were moments in the movie where the emotion was so thick that I wanted to clamp down on Tim's thigh, just above the knee, and squeeze as hard as I could to relieve the tension.

This was followed by a gastronomical gastric attack from a free chocolate bar I had been offered. It is a low carb diet chocolate bar made with maltitol, a sugar alcohol that doesn't rot teeth. As I was munching on the bar and noting its unique flavor I thought I should look up maltitol as I had never heard of it before. I immediatly gravitated to an article titled "Malitol, just say NO" and it is there that my bathroom doom was prophesied over me. It apparently makes the bowels irate.

I had problems sleeping last night because a) I had just watched countless people be murdered on the silver screen and the images were dancing around my head and b) my bowels were vibrating. Then my neck started to hurt, followed by the chills which turned into a sweaty fever. My whole body began to ache and my lungs felt fatigued. I thought I was coming down with the flu. I prayed and asked the Lord to heal me, and made it easier on Him by downing three tylenol at once.

I woke up 92% my usual self this morning. Knock on wood, I think I have beat whatever is ailing me.

Update, 11:44 PM: I'm feeling soo ill and I'm getting the shakes again. Time for another Tylenol cocktail.

I should stop snorting

I found a funny comment left on this Flickr photo, urging me to stop using drugs. I hope that my gaunt features, pale completion, and dishevelled hair are not leaving a junkie impression on the minds of my viewers. I'm not a druggie! I'm just hungrie! I'm living under a self imposed poverty to ease my debts.

Really, though, on my entertainment budget of $20 per week it would be nearly impossible to keep up even an occasional smoking habit. I have nothing to pawn for instant cash, asides from my laptop/camera. I would sooner go into rehab.

Oh! And just to let you know, I could sell my body, but my boney features turn people away at the street corner. Trix aern't for this kid.

Update: October 2006

Click To Play

I've been digitally different the past while, some of you might have noticed. The month of October can do that to you. It sure did it to me. Autumn colours, awful viruses and altered surroundings abound.

Here's an update of October 2006. Where I'm at, recent decisions, excuses and a tour!

See Vous Play is on it's way, I promise. That's explained in the update.

P.S. When I say "I've started typing," I meant 'typewriting'. You know, with a typewriter!

This is my enemy

"The virus is spread through the aerosolized goo that comes out of your mouth or nose when coughing or sneezing. One whiff of this viral mist is often enough to infect you. Even touching a deposited spray on tables or doors can do the trick, if you then touch your mouth or nose before washing.

And the stricken are contagious at least a day before the tell-tail symptoms of fever, fatigue and body aches appear. They can be infectious up to seven days after they become ill." - The Toronto Star

My Enemy

This is my foe, as of late.

Noosh's first vlog experiment

Noosh needs help gathering video and editing her first vlog ever!!!  She's travelling to Paris soon, and would like to capture the entire trip for us shmoes at home.

 

Dawww, thanks! 

See Vous Play?

I know, you all must be wondering where the heck my See Vous Play video is.


No?
Really?


Oh...

Well I'm still sick and poopy and can't bring myself to concentrate on vlogging at the moment. Yesterday I took the day off and didn't even TOUCH my computer! I've been immersing myself in "David Suzuki - The Autobiography" and watching taped episodes of Lost 3 and Grey's Anatomy on VHS (Tee Voe my butt).

Bookmark me or subscribe. It will eventually be broadcast!

Fakin' It

I discovered a fake $10 bill while on the job this evening. I'm too damned determined to be the best I can be, so I told the customer (a young punk who's wrists were wrapped in bandages for boxing) that he was going to have to take a seat while I called the police. He balked and complained. He told me that if it was a real $10, he was going to get a refund, loudly, while I was on the phone with the police lady. I couldn't hear her over his whining. I glared at him and plugged my one ear. He didn't like this.

I am still sick with the flu (it's been identified), and my body is still wiped out. I need to run to the toilet at odd, inconvenient times. The kid paced around the store hissing "I ain't giving no pig my full name" and then told me he was leaving to get his mom, who was waiting in a minivan outside. It was spitting outside, the little droplets shining and fading in the headlamps of the van. Clearly she expected her son would be in and out, why turn off the ignition? He left, and reassured me "Dude, I'm not leaving, I'm getting my $10 back, this is bullshit!"

It's a crime to hand someone back a bill you believe to be fake. And it's also a crime to pick up and leave without returning once a cashier has alerted you that they are suspicious about some tender you just handed them. My bowels also thought it was a crime to exist at that particular point. In fact, they rejected their purpose in my body and decided to move.

The cop showed up late, apologized, took one look at the bill, and gave me a quick wink while whipping open a pad of paper for questioning. Turns out my hawk eyes are too sharp; my finger pads too sensitive; my intuition too tuned for your phony trickery, fakers!

Canadian Thanksgiving

Click image to play

It's Thanksgiving in Canada. We celebrate 3 weeks before the States, because our harvest on average ends earlier, due to our higher latitude.

I'm sick and thankful.

P.S. I don't know how to sound balance to save my life.

Vlog week Day 3/5

Watch the vlog

This is the vlog I tried to upload for 2 days in a row. Dial up is cursed. With a capital CURSE ED.

Tags: tyas, palendromicrhumathism, michael tyas, videobloggingweek2006

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Back Spasm

My poor body. I woke up in a strange position the other day and have been plauged by mysterious pains ever since. I had to take the day off work on Friday, but it didn't keep me from vlogging.

I also spelled Palindromic Rheumatism very very wrong.

Formats available: Quicktime (.mov), Flash Video (.flv)

Imago Dei

I travel to my new hostel. I visit Imago Dei. I meet Don Miller. I almost die. I visit Laruelhurst Park. I go star gazing.